the night before thanksgiving

 

for my friend

who grieves

the loss of

his wife

his mother

her father

his friend

his lover

her future

 

in mourning

for family

dreams and

memories

lost bearings

woven heartstrings

closet imaginings

a sense of

reality that

was moved away

from a center

that never existed

grieving

what we thought

the world perhaps

the galaxy was

meant to be

moved so far

in time from

romance

hope and

intelligence

fences took

us toward

a safety that

never was

quite found

the hope for

death as an

aphrodisiac

relief from

confusion

lack of clarity

frustration

that all our

gifts lay

wasting

yes it

was no where

near as pleasant

as should it

ought to have

been

we walked

away from

sunshine

into a

profound

sadness

why

not one

of us

has the

answer

so much

was given

so much

was lost

we prayed to

our gods and

mostly it

was futile

loved ones

died and

we were

left with

frozen nothings

even photographs

of childhood

brought pain

sin was ne’er

removed

we were duped

into belief

future

came

and went

into an

irretrievable

past

poets

all of us

lost behind

a giant

oak tree

singing

through

the wind

and rain

waiting

for a

sunshine

that might

stay for more

than just

a day

sounds of

children

 laughing

bring the

most of us

to joy

others

linger with

the ticking clock

shoes that

are too small

nightgowns

never worn

packages of

presents

unopened

lights

dimmed

far too

low

quiet

that is

not the

least bit

soothing

smells

of times

and people

waiting

for something

that never

had a

chance

to appear

white

taffeta

draperies

reminding

us of

wedding

days

when music

played and

people

danced

and plates

and glasses

clinked

who was

there with

us were

we there

alone

dirt

cold

from

thawing

snow

grass

not totally

dead uncovered

chilled

earth

forgotten

plans

all the hours

of laughter

working some

small job

with folks

we loved

enjoying

simple pleasures

milk deliveries

letters from

another place

clotheslines

filled with

freshly scented

laundry

newly mowed

grass and

clipped hedges

freshly painted

shutters and

squeaking

cleanly windows

new aluminum

ladders

detached garages

neighborhood

swimming pools

gently flowing

rivers

towering pine

trees

falling leaves

billowing clouds

and newly

sprayed guard rails

elementary

school

photographs

spring flower gardens

children\

practicing

musical instruments

school plays

choruses

church bazaars

foreign languages

smells of pot roast

stew spaghetti

children playing

baseball

hide and seek

jump rope

riding bicycles

and raking

leaves

father’s

car at

four o’clock

mother’s

dishes

 on the

table

dinner

conversation

homework

television

bath-time

bed

the days

were glorious

even as they

sped from

not one

to too

many

time spared

none of us

the truth is

all of us

tells an

individual

story about

the same events

which take

a totally

different meaning

with each telling

and in the end

the telling sits

upon a shelf

somewhere

waiting to be

retrieved

dreams died

so they might

awaken in

some new

place and

time

we know

everything

and then

we know

nothing

and both

 of these we

do ferociously

 it all

makes sense

 eventually

we have

nothing

and then

 we have

everything

a nd then

all of it

disappears

we think we

are observing many

things that are

observing us

we can sigh

in relief once

we see the

continual ebb

and flow which

does not need

anything about

us

there are

simple

pleasantries

we can always

gather

the smell of

food flowers wine

the look of

fashion fields freedom

the sound of

forests farms friends

the touch of

fathers families feelings

the taste of

failure frameworks figs

it moves us

once we

realize

more is

behind us

than ahead

but we

all conveniently

forget this

over and over

and over again